This is a spoiler-filled Game of Thrones Season 7 Episode 2, “Stormborn” recap
“Dragonstone” had us thinking Daenerys had everything under control. Which she did. Until she didn’t. “Stormborn” started out with Daenerys dragging Varys through the mud, calling him out for having played a role in Robert Baratheon’s order to have Daenerys killed.
She pardons Varys and is joined by Melisandre to complete the cohort of allies that are to take on Cersei. In total, the Mad King’s daughter has allied with House Tyrell, the Sands, and Theon and Yara Greyjoy. By the end of the episode, however, Euron Greyjoy’s fleet has left her with nothing but Olenna Tyrell.
Up in the North, Jon has left Winterfell in Sansa’s hands while Arya makes her way home, hoping to reunite with Jon. While we’re gutted that she’s most likely going to miss him, we’re letting it go because he’s on his way to meet with Daenerys. The Mother of Dragons has called on to him at the Red Priestess’ behest.
Do you know what that means? It’s #ProphecyTime in Westeros.
A brief commentary on what went down in Game of Thrones Season 7 Episode 2, “Stormborn”
Euron Greyjoy wipes out half of Daenerys’ chess pieces
G: We should’ve known Punk Rock Greyjoy was going to make an appearance.
R: CAN SOMEONE KILL EURON PLEASE?! Dany has three dragons! Can’t she just call in an orbital strike?
M: Euron Greyjoy is the seas equivalent of Ramsey Bolton, and I’m so here for it.
Theon Greyjoy has a 2007 Britney breakdown
G: To be quite honest, I knew immediately he was going to run. In all fairness, that scene was just some amazing TV. You’ll never forget the specks of burning flesh and Theon’s face as he opted for jumping off board.
R: Theon’s breakdown isn’t actually Theon’s fault. Yara should have known better than to drag her brother, who clearly was suffering from some form of PTSD (who wouldn’t be) at the end of last season, into battle with her. I hope that Theon gets the chance to redeem himself that he deserves in the form of gutting his uncle, and then maybe a long vacation and some much-needed therapy.
M: One minute Theon’s about to watch his sister seduce the queen of Dorne and the next he’s watching her with an axe to her bleeding face. I would have run from both of those situations.
Arya visits Hot Pie, runs into Nymeria, and will probably miss Jon on her way to Winterfell
G: For the first time in forever, Arya had a calm and almost heart-warming storyline. She met with Hot Pie, he told her “friends don’t pay,” and informed her that her favorite brother is King in the North. But of course, Jon has to decide to leave Winterfell and Nymeria (or not Nymeria) has to reject Arya.
R: I genuinely shouted HOT PIE at my television when he appeared on screen. It’s been such a long time since Arya was genuinely happy, and not running for her life, that her old pal’s appearance was a wonderful reprieve from the usual doom-and-gloom of her story arc. And I can’t help but hope that Hot Pie making an appearance means a reunion with Gendry is just on the horizon. Arya’s reunion with Nymeria makes me nervous. Her denial over the now completely wild direwolf being her former pet seems to reflect that Arya no longer resembles the innocent girl from Season One. She’s wild too, and that doesn’t bode well.
M: As happy as I am to see Arya confront her past, it’s hard to see her embrace and accept her future during the meeting with Nymeria. She has become everything she told her dad she would become in season one. I have a nagging feeling this isn’t something to celebrate just yet.
Missandei and Grey Worm have their moment
G: I guess it makes sense why they didn’t show his peen.
R: These two make my heart so incredibly happy (their relationship is so gentle and lovely compared to every other romantic relationship in this show) that if anything happens to either one of them I’ll be inconsolable.
M: Well, I can cross off watching a lengthy oral sex scene with my parents off of my “things I never want to experience again” list.
Sam takes on Jorah’s greyscale
G: Just when you thought you had enough with Old Man Tarly signing up to defend Cersei, Sam decides to remove Jorah’s greyscale. Which would’ve been nice and noble had they not SHOWN the procedure and transitioned out of oozing pus and into a bowl of cream soup.
R: Everyone could use a Sam Tarly in their life. Also, that transition from oozing pus to creamy soup was one of the most clever uses of a transition I’ve seen in a long time. It was deeply unpleasant and genuinely funny.
M: I’m rooting for Jorah’s redemption in the coming battle, but I am never putting butter on my popcorn again after this scene.
“Stormborn” Episode Vitals:
MVP: Jon Snow about to strangle Littlefinger
Honestly, we care more about when and how will Littlefinger be terminated than who keeps the Iron Throne. That, our love for JonxSansa, and the parallels between Season 1 Ned and Season 7 Jon threatening to murder Littlefinger is something we are 100% here for.
Favorite Moment: Littlefinger’s face when he realized he did not have this shit under control
Biggest Annoyance: Theon Greyjoy never rising up to the moment
Best Line: “He’s a clever man, your hand. I’ve known a great deal of clever men. I’ve outlived them all. You want to know how? I ignored them.” – Olenna Tyrell
Race for the Throne:
Fourth Place: Daenerys Targaryen
At the beginning of the episode, Daenerys seemed set for life. Now, she’s lost the Iron Islands fleet and the Dorne army. Does she still have enough to make it to the throne? Yes. But her team’s morale has dropped significantly. It’ll all depend on what Tyrion can come up with next.
Third Place: Sansa Stark
With Jon gone, Sansa is Queen in the North. If anything happens to him and Daenerys, Sansa will be the lone monarch standing.
Second Place: Cersei Lannister
Her not-beau just won her some serious points and her actual beau got her the Tarlys.
First Place: Euron Greyjoy
Obliterating his niece’s fleet might have been his idea of a gift to Cersei, but it doesn’t change the fact that he’s the one with the horsepower right now. With that momentum, Cersei’s one snarky comment away from being collateral damage.
Thanks for tuning in to “Game of Thrones S7E02: Race for the Throne Recap.” We’ll be back next week! Live tweet with us when the Episode 3 airs at 9PM EST.